proudAPmom

Happy Easter to All - Have a great Sunday!  I haven’t been online much lately and it is evident here as I have not posted in some time.The morning sickness (all day sickness) has pretty much gone 100% now and I am eating like a champ again. LOL. I feel huge, but this is my second and I never really did get back into the swing of excercise, but was I ever in the swing?…Anyhow, I have felt the baby kick once, and feel the little whisper light movements other times. I love the feeling of the baby kicking and moving and look forward to feeling it more regularly. The only thing I don’t really look forward to is the hiccups - those drove me nuts and would keep me awake at night :PRobbie is dealing with another nasal thing- thick, green mucos running from his nose all the time. The poor kid has been having a hard time breathing and his cheeks and upper lip are getting red and sore from the dripping. Today his cheeks are so  bright red.I just placed an order for some more natural products for him - a natural childrens toothpaste and a natural hand sanitizer. I don’t like the purell since it has so many unsafe chemicles in it. I’ve been trying to slowly get rid of items that have caustic chemicles in them, but it is becoming difficult - replacing all our products is getting expensive, so I may have to slow down a bit. Overall, I feel like we’ve made some good changes and I know better what things I want to change once we have more funds available. Things that I didn’t think would be too bad, were actually really bad for our health and that made me sad - to think that we are still using such nasty items on our skin. There is a website for those interested that will show you what products contain and how they are rated for safety. My goal is to keep all our products in the 0-2 range. My shampoo that I currently use is rated somewhere around a 5-6 I think and I am anxious to try something new there - but I have such dry hair and I’ve tried to switch to a natural product before only to have my hair become very dry, heavy and hard to comb through. I just read today that if you have longer hair (longer than shoulder length) that it can be harder to switch over. I don’t think I will be cutting my hair short anytime soon, so I may have to play around with some other products to find what works…so here is the web link - http://www.cosmeticdatabase.com/.It really is a great resource for those who want to clean up their skin care or that of their children/baby. 

So, I lost my voice the other day…urgh, what a hassle. Trying to deal with a toddler with no voice. My nose is like a faucet…and my throat hurts. I started to get a bit of a fever the other day, but thankfully it went down pretty quickly. My voice made it’s return today…but is still rough sounding. I finally feel a little better today though. I got a lot accomplished for how I am feeling too. I went out with my son for gymnastics this morning, then to a playground for a little bit. Before gymnastics I went to WalMart to get a key made, but they didn’t have the right one. They told me to go to K-Mart because Lowes was too expensive. I went to K-Mart but they also didn’t have the right key. After the park I went to Lowes and they made a key for me, but when I got home it was the wrong one. I had to go back later - I got my husband ready for work and then tried to nap a little. I was tired and cranky and my son just wouldn’t nap. Finally I got up and got him ready to go - we went out and got the right key. I took him out to eat at Cici’s Pizza and then we went to WalMart where I got quite a few items that we needed- a new laundry basket, new juice cups that are a bit heavier than the last ones (the others ones broke way to easily), candy and toys for easter baskets, and a few groceries.I got home, fed the doggies, cleaned the floors, washed counters, did some laundry, and picked up toys. I did little things that I had been neglecting for the past week where I haven’t been feeling all that great.Today has been really nice as far as the temperature goes - it was around 63 today. It is supposed to be warmer tomorrow, but it has been overcast all day. I would love to see some sun, but I will take the warmer weather! I took the blankets off the kitchen windows, it was nice to have more light in the kitchen and it feels so much more open. I know that we have to be careful since it could stil get cold again and then we will loose a lot of heat that way.I am really starting to show now, I am 9 weeks into the pregnancy and I get really anxious about it since I have been so sick and have to take quite a bit of tylenol this time around - I took very little when preggo with my son. I sure hope that things get better from here on out, I don’t want to have to take any more meds.  

Today I woke up early and I dozed for a bit before finally getting up to feed the dogs. My sweet little boy is still sleeping, thankfully, so that leaves me with some time to myself so I can get a few things acomplished.So far I have moved some of his toys into the great room which is currently closed for the cold weather and pulled out some toys he hasn’t played with in quite a long time. Then I put clothes in the washer, moved towels to the dryer and fed the dogs. Started my husbands coffee, put away clean dishes and then poured husbands coffee into his thermos. I ate a bowl of cereal and now I am sitting here at the computer. I feel like I am more with it today, and hopefully I will be able to keep up the momentum as I have so much to do today.I am really behind on laundry, and I haven’t really cleaned much in the past few days - I’ve just been so exhausted. I took my son to the library yesterday and almost fell asleep sitting there - I just had nothing. Finally I got him home and I kept dozing on the couch - the poor kid just wanted to play and I wasn’t much fun at all.Today I take my son to story time at the library and it looks like I will have to sign him up for the spring session (which I think is a wonderful sign that spring is finally on it’s way!) but I don’t know if that means there will be a week or two off or if it will just continue right through. After story time I will bring him home, make lunch and continue to clean where I can. Then I have an appointment at the chiropractors for an adjustment. I am excited about this - my neck has been bothering me just a bit and I look forward to the relief I get from the adjustments.After that appointment I don’t have anything else planned for the day. I will continue to clean up and catch up. My husband goes back to work tomorrow and he needs clean laundry and I need to get my act together as far as meals and making things ready for him. I haven’t really wanted to cook lately due to the morning sickness, but I am feeling a bit better and I am forcing myself to eat, which makes me want to eat more….sometimes I still feel a little ill, but most times I am plugging away at food.My biggest cravings this time around: salad with wild Maine blueberry dressing, broccoli, turkey sandwich with pickles, homemade mac n cheese with pickles, fish, veggie subs (subway), and oranges. I can’t seem to get enough oranges. I drink orange juice and eat one or two oranges a day. I also love ice cold water with a slice of lemon or lime in it. These cravings are so different from the first time  when all I could stand to eat was sweets (donuts, iced coffee, chocolate, soda) and meats. I loved burgers and chicken wings but couldn’t stand anything green during my first pregnancy. This time it is like the opposite. Interesting…. 

My morning responsibility is to wake up at 6am and feed our two large dogs. They sleep in the upstairs hallway and if they are not fed on time will whine and pace the hallway, waking everyone up. For the past 3-4 days my son has woken up at 5:30-5:45am to start nursing. He nurses right through until 6:20am. I try to pull away to go and feed the dogs and instead of him just rolling over and going back to sleep he starts screaming and crying, thus waking up my husband, which is what I am trying to avoid.So, what am I to do? I have a toddler who will scream if I get up to feed the dogs, and dogs that will pace and whine if I don’t get up and feed them!This morning I get up at 6:15, toddler starts screaming and crying (I want to scream and cry -I haven’t slept well, had a migraine yesterday, my breasts are sore from pregnancy hormones), I grab the child, go downstairs and put the dogs outside. I set the kid down while I put away dishes in the dish strainer that are really annoying me since I am really tired and sore. He screams and cries the whole time I am doing this small task. Finally I go and get the dogs to feed them. I bring them in and take them to the entrance way to feed them. I have them sit and pour their food. I release them to eat, and take the child to the couch to lay him back down. He lies down with me but wants to nurse again, OMG the pain! I nurse for as long as I possibly can - the dogs are now whining to come back inside the warm house and are starting to really annoy me.  I get up to let the dogs in and the child starts screaming again. I want to run away…Before, when I would get up in the morning I would be able to leave me son in bed while I came down took care of the dogs, cleaned up a bit, made coffee for my husband, brought down some clean clothes for me and the kiddo, then took the child from bed and transfered him to the couch, where he would sleep until 8-9am. I would usually lie back down myself and snooze until he woke up, which made up for all the time lost through the night nursing and having to get up to feed the dogs.Now, I am over tired, cranky and just not a nice person to be around and I don’t like it. My son is also more cranky - he needs his sleep and it is not working. I can’t move the time of feeding the dog, but somehow I have to change how the kiddo nurses or when he nurses.So, now I have to somehow get through the day….tired and my head aching (hopefully I won’t have a repeat of yesterday - a nasty migraine) with a cranky toddler and a lot of house cleaning to do. 

After not having a computer monitor at home for over a week, I am now finally able to get on the computer at home, thanks to my husband getting me a used monitor for now. I got a new due date when I was at the doctors this last week - I am now due October 9th. That is one week later than the date the nurse had given me.We have all been sick this past week as well - me morning sickness and a slight cold (sore throat, loss of voice for a few hours, cough), my son - cough, problems with his right lung and a very runny nose and diarrhea. My husband is now sick, taking the day off from work. He has the chills, a fever and body aches. Food doesn’t appeal to him and he is very tired. I got him some medications and he is trying to sleep it off. He has three very heavy blankets on him yet he still feels cold.I have a mystery shop that I am going to do right now. I put it off and then decided to do it afterall since I have use of the van instead of the old car. My son is having a melt down now too, so I should get going to finish this shop before I have a full-out cranky toddler.  

Good Morning! Today has been going pretty good so far. After a rough night of sleep (my son wanted to nurse most of the night and early this morning) we went to story time and he did really well. He participated really well in the songs and finger plays that they do each week. He often doesn’t participate since he is so shy, but I was blown away by how well he did today. Perhaps because I was busy talking with another mom that was sitting next to me…I don’t know. The mom I was sitting next to invited us to a playgroup that will happen on Monday, I might go since I don’t have anything else planed at this time. Another mom wanted to try to get together on Mondays, but we haven’t talked any further on it, so I am not going to worry about it this week. I figure what I will do is get my name and number to her on Friday and let her know more about the HMN meetings once a month and then take it from there. If she wants to get together sometime, she could always give me a call or we could set something up at story time or at gymnastics when we see her anyhow. It is a nice feeling to start making some friends, I just wish I could remember names better. I usually remember the names of the kids better than I do of the moms - I just don’t hear their names so often. The kids sometimes have name tags and sometimes the teachers are saying their names, so it gets ingrained a bit faster. I even asked the gymnastics teacher what one of the moms names was and she didn’t remember - she only remembered the name of the child.  I am still feeling good from the last chiropractor appointment and tomorrow is my first OB/GYN appointment of the pregnancy and I am super excited! Despite others telling me that I should skip a ultrasound, I am hoping for one. I would like to know how big the baby is, the approx age and if there is only one (which I would guess there is). I think the ultra sounds always made it feel just a little more real, too. I am not having any symptoms of pregnancy except that I have to go to the bathroom a lot more, but thankfully no morning sickness. I do have a few food adversions, I guess - like coffee, and food in general just doesn’t sound appealing to me. Today we have to take a long drive to my husbands doctor - my husband has had a cyst that grows up in his wrist that becomes quite painful as it gets larger - it has come back after 3 surgeries to remove it. He is looking at surgery #4 which we are not looking forward to since he will be out of work for probably around 2-1/2 months and we won’t have much income during that time.  We will have to see what benefits we will be eligable for during that time since I am pregnant this time, and we have a child. These breaks from work give my husband more time to study for school, but make it very difficult to turn in work since he must type everything because he is on-line college. 

We are still waiting for our tax return. I have been anxious about getting the money since we are really tight and we need to pay our bills. Also, we have other things that we wanted to do with some of the money and I am getting impaitent. I got a word today at church that I took to heart - stop panicking. I really needed to hear that as that is what I’ve been doing - I think the worse possible scenario then I start having panic attacks then I start crying and I’m a mess for myself and for my whole family. So that has got to stop.    I am also waiting for my back to get better. I hurt it on Wednesday by shoveling the yards (a few lousy scoops was all I did) and I am still in so much pain. I can’t lift my son, and it really makes me sad as well as frustrated since I can’t get much done. I can’t stand up straight by the end of the day, and that is when I like to finish up my housework. During the early part of the day is when I spend family time since my husband works nights. Anyhow, I see the chiropractor again tomorrow and hopefully he can give me some relief with the adjustment. I got some relief from the first visit but not long lasting enough to really help me. I don’t know how we are going to afford it, but as long as we get the tax money in soon, we should be ok. I am thankful that I am able to see a doctor and have some help - like my husband said, it is a good thing that it happened now instead of when I am further along in the pregnancy and can’t do much about it. Already I feel some what restricted by what I can do since I can’t take a lot of medication to help with the pain, and I can’t take super hot baths and things like that.    Some days it is hard to believe that I am pregnant again, I really don’t even feel like it. I would love to have a pile more of those pregnancy tests that I got on-line to just test every day, but I don’t have any left and I am not going to waste money. It was so nice to get up in the morning and take a test just to show myself that I am really pregnant. On Thursday I got to see the new OB/GYN and get the proof that I am in fact pregnant, and then I can use that to get WIC and sign up for Medicaid. My husbands income right now is so low, that our family size should qualify. As soon as he finishes college, he will hopefully find a better job with better health coverage, although with this economy I will not hold my breath. We’ve been through tougher times, and now that we have children there are more agencies who are willing to help. I know that probably sounds horrible, but when you are a married couple with no children, there is practically no one to help when you hit a rough spot. I was once told by a human services worker that in order for us to get assistance, I would have to divorce my husband or at least be legaly seperated, then I could get assistance. She told me that he could still visit, but I would need to have him live somewhere else. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing! I understand that sometimes people get in desperate measures and may have to trick the system to get help, but I wasn’t about to do that. I felt like we were stuck, but we got through eventually. I know we will get through this time as well. It might take some time, but we will get through. I will continue to do what I think is best for my children and family and trust that in time things will turn out allright. I need to post my second part to the work at home jobs - be looking for it soon. 

Today I got up and got my son ready for gymnastics. I was feeling okay, and I quickly took my prenatal before running out the door with my son. We were on our way, when my stomach starting turning and feeling so bad. I thought I was going to throw up.  When I was pregnant with my son, I never had any morning sickness, and I took the prenatal vitamin through the whole pregnancy without any problems. So, I don’t know if this was a true case of morning sickness, or just me being sensitive to the vitamin. I wanted to eat something, but couldn’t figure out anything that sounded good to eat - everything that I thought of made me feel sick. I finally settled on a bottle of milk at the pharmacy and a rice crispy treat.  Not exactly nutritious, but better than nothing.I dreamed about lemon pie and apple crisp last night. I am making apple crisp right now.With my last pregnancy I craved meats! Chicken wings, hamburgers and steaks were what I wanted and they tasted so good. Today, I didn’t even want to think about meats, and instead most foods sound pretty gross to me. I did eat something that tasted so wonderful when I got home from gymnastics - club crackers. I dip them in whipped cream cheese that is topped with raspberry jam - So Yummy!!! I could continue to eat those, but I don’t want to fill up before dinner. Perhaps I will be able to eat some of it without feeling ill. I sure hope that I don’t have the morning sickness, but I wonder if I do, does that mean I am having a girl?  I am really looking forward to getting together with the Holistic Moms Network in February for a round table - we are going to discuss things that we want to talk about in upcoming meetings - my focus before was more towards doing more natural things for my family, now I would also like to figure out more natural things I can specifically do during pregnancy. I don’t want to just use any body creams, or medications in my body while I am pregnant. I am also still breastfeeding my 2 year old, so I need support on that - especially if I start to get sore, or when he does his power nurses. I sometimes wish he would just quit, but I also know that my son is very shy and it is a way of feeling connected to me and close. I don’t want him to loose that before he is ready. He is very unsure of new situations and with having a new baby, he may need the comfort of the breast later on. I guess time will tell. 

At least that is what I am blaming it on. For the past few nights I’ve been so tired early on. Last night for instance, I was exhausted at 6:30pm and I fell asleep at 8pm. My son was not ready for bed, but he did fine. He usually stays up with me until around 9:30-10pm, so this was quite a bit earlier. Then I am waking way too early - yesterday morning I woke at 4am, this morning I woke at 2am. I was able to get back to sleep today, only because I got up and went pee and then had a large glass of milk mixed with Ovaltine because I was starving! There wasn’t anything that I really wanted to eat at that hour and I was in a hurry to get back to bed bofore I couldn’t sleep at all. It helped too, since I was able to go back to sleep eventually…after reading two magazines I fell asleep. I had to get back up at 6am to feed the dogs, and then I brought the kiddo downstairs at 6:30 and we dozed on the couch until around 8am which felt wonderful.I have been really moody and it doesn’t help that I’ve had my heart set on paying off our bills, getting some new clothes and upgrading my lousy cell phone for a very nice sleek new number. I filed taxes on the 19th of January. The first message I got said that I could expect my return by January 30th, then a new message said the 4th of Feb. I was dealing okay with that, then yesterday I checked back and there was a new date again! Now it has moved to the 10th. I called and waited on hold for 30 minutes before getting a woman who was no help at all. I wanted to cry. She didn’t understand why this would annoy the heck out of me. We are a low income family and we get all these tax breaks for me staying home with our children - we need any extra money we can get until my husband finds a better job. I was so excited to know we would have the money in time to pay some bills, but now I am worried again that we will loose our money (although I don’t know to what) and I am also worried that they will try to hold out longer on giving us our money.She did tell me that they have up to three weeks to process a return - the week of the 9th is the third week and she said they always do direct deposits on the Friday, so I guess we are plannning on the 13th. So I don’t know why they don’t just put that on the webpage instead of the 10th. As long as we get our money! 

I am beginning to hate snow this year. We are just getting more and more of the white stuff dumped on us. Today we are supposed to have 10″ by 4pm. We are getting close - and there was freezing rain and sleet to mix it up a bit. I cancelled an oil change on the van, and I skipped my sons story time, the first time we’ve done this :(My husband went to work to participate in training today, and is due to come home around noon. I sure hope the roads are okay for him as he drives back. We can’t get the driveway plowed because all the plow companies and overbooked and won’t have any openings until tomorrow. We don’t really have the money anyhow. And to top it all off, we don’t have snow shovels. We’ve been just driving through it, but this stuff is nasty - I sure hope we are able to get out tomorrow when we need to. Off to do some laundry and get some cleaning done. I am super tired right now, and all I want to do is eat - I am pregnant and the cravings are starting. I love meat during the first trimester :)